A manifesto of likes

I would like to get my driver’s license (woohoo!)



I would like stable ground. I would like the feeling of having space, and runway, of there not being a feeling of constant urgency (to act, do)



I would like to have a budget, to better understand what my material and financial constraints are.



I would like to continue my spiritual practice(s) (meditation, breathing). Ideally, in community.



I would like to continue to invest in my physicality, my vitality, my strength. Running, bodyweight exercises, lifting. Ideally, with others / in community.



Re both of the above, I was struck by something Soryu said to me recently, which was the way we can spend so much of our time either wanting to do things, or trying to make ourselves do things, and not actually (and more easefully!) doing the things. It’s the difference between trying to get yourself to run all day, and a friend tapping you on the shoulder and being like, “hey, wanna go on a run?” Figuring out the ways structure, schedules, routines, and I think most importantly and most fun-ly, community, can help us become our best selves with the least amount of willpower and self-fighting necessary, is a huge win.



I would like to have responsibilities/engagements/commitments that are outside myself. This could look like studies (taking classes!), yard work, a job, volunteer work, or other sorts of projects, explorations, and committments. [Like learning to sing.]



I would like the help of community to adhoc-ly plan my daily flow. Meals together, going on runs, meditations. I’m learning that managing a whole day by myself is actually quite a hard task! And it’s a ‘responsibility’ that we don’t seem to need to bear alone. [It feels like I spend a lot of time in my head, trying to figure out what to do. I think having a community, structure, could help]



I would like to spend less time in my head figuring out what to do. Fighting myself. Planning. Deciding.



I would like the end the fight with myself. I would like to spend less time in certain loops I have around planning and decision-ing. I would like to spend more time “living my life.” I would like to understand how to best work with, relate to, and orient around certain loops and patterns, in the near and medium term. Seek to understand them? Seek to resolve them? Seek to learn how to create space around them?



I would like to live with friends!



I would like to further my work with plant medicines. Ideally, I would like to spend some time in 2021 working with some of the medicine traditions present in South America (Brazil, Peru)



I would like help. I would like support. I would like male mentorship. It feels like there are things I’m struggling with, that are proving to be difficult to resolve on my own. But this doesn’t seem to need to be the case! I imagine a guiding hand, someone who’s “been there”, could help me figure things out a bit faster.



I would like to have love for myself.



I would like help being … patient



I would like to take small, simple steps. One at a time. In the world. Here we go...