Day 12: Worries

I just need some place to jot down all the things I hate so I can confront them, somehow:

  1. That some “fengshui masters” have to tell my parents that my room's light shouldn't be placed in the centre of the room. So they shiftted the light towards 1 side of the room and now wherever my bed is, it's dim af. This hurts my eyes when I'm working from my bed because the ceiling light is glaring (shining towards me alongisde my screen)


    What's with these people? Do they even understand what are lights for?


  2. I might not be able to make enough money from my part-time developer job. That would have greatly helped me in alleviating my financial burdens – transport costs, food expenses and most critically, paying for my 3 months stay in China from Sep to Dec 2020.


    The stress is partly coming from a misalignment of expectations


    1. I was rather sure I could make around $1.6K a month from this job.

    2. I'm paid on an hourly basis and I expected to work the set amount of hours when we negotiated my contract. It didn't happen because there weren't enough tasks for this month.

    3. I should have clarified what's the starting date and what happens if we don't have enough tasks to meet the hours for that month

    4. Doing more hours the next month would add more stress to my scheduling which I am already comfortable with. I chose a remote job because I wanted the flexibility and less stress from such issues.


  3. How my closest friends and myself are affected by negative people in our lives. I fucking hate people who only criticize and end up creating a net subtractive situation. This makes everyone unhappy, uneasy and unproductive.


    Sure you can have your own opinion but if they are not going to be additive – beneficial to anyone as a whole – I suggest keeping that to yourself. However, you will soon find that if you are generally a negative person, then this ends up becoming detrimental to your health or social life. Because you are bottling it up (this affects your health whether you like it or not) or your friends and family hate to hang out with you (because they don't want to be your psychologist)


    When people are affected by net subtractive people, it cascades down their social circle. This means the world could be better off without your net subtractive mindset. You are preventing people from contributing value to the world. Stop doing that.


  4. Feeling sick recently has impeded my momentum. I don't know why but I have been waking up in mornings with snot that has green phelgm in it. Some quick googling tells me this is most likely a case of a sinus infection. I have no idea why this happens and feeling sick from this really drains my energy – I sleep in for much longer than I should. This in turn reduces the amount of time I can spend on school work, my part-time work and side projects.

Action Plan

I'm not going to be hypocritical and end up complaining about all these and becoming net subtractive. So what am I going to do about all these problems?

  1. I'll find some LED lights to install on the other side of my room (I'm not going to care about what someone else thinks about where my lights should go. Unless I'm convinced by a good logical explanation and a reasonable substitute solution)


  2. I'll have to find some additional freelance gigs or work additional hours. I'll also have to talk to my company about this and come to a compromise. This will add some stress to my schedule and health but it's better than me facing the consequences later on – not having enough money for the trip and monthly expenses.


  3. Avoid less of such people – not the best way to be a friend but I'll say my piece and let time do its work for them to improve themselves.


  4. Take more vitamins and work out more regularly. I'll commit to taking my vitamins daily from today onwards. I'll also commit to working out at least once every 2 days.

To reply you need to sign in.