Day 53: deliberate conversations

I wrote about how advice doesn't work but action does in Day 52's journal. I engaged in random conversations with my school mates today on Telegram and I regret it. Looking back in hindsight, it was a waste of time. They held very strong opinions and ideas about certain things and these are the people that wouldn't take advice easily. Yet, I still tried to say things like:

  • People could achieve much more if the had the right mindset

  • How to be ahead of 99.9999% of our peers in terms of career and financial success

  • Why people should read 50+ books

For the past few years, I have read and heard plenty of advice from people around me and on the web. Doing some introspection, I noticed that we take advice only when we are ready for it – when the heart is willing and the mind prepared. Without those conditions, no advice is ever going to get through into that thick skull of ours. That's just how people are.

The people that tend to be more successful in their careers and personal growth are those that are able to continuously rewire their minds to be ready for advice. They are perpetually updating their mental models and sharpening their thinking skills. When opportunity strikes, they are prepared for it and are able to seize it.

We see this quite often in the media and in biographies, but often forget about how it takes work to train the mind.

Again, I should have just focused on Young Makers or sharpening my thinking skills (by reading, taking notes and writing thought essays) instead of partaking in useless banter.

I will definitely be more deliberate about the kind of conversations I have. For instance, I'd rather have a 30 to 45 minute call with an interesting person and an agenda for what we will both talk about. Mat Sherman runs a daily podcast where he interviews someone interesting everyday. I tweeted that I'd like to start a podcast and he gave the best piece of advice that tipped things over for me:

It's about the 1 on 1 conversations, not the metrics like views – Mat Sherman

Why was I ever engaged in that random banter with my friends which added no value to either party? I could have been in a deliberate conversation with someone who was willing to exchange ideas with me instead of people with closed mindsets.

I'm sold on doing a daily podcast and this will be my next system when I'm done with my last exam paper on 15th April. I will commit to doing this for a year and see where it takes me.

Thanks Mat! If I could have you as an informal mentor of sorts, it would be awesome. I'd really love to learn from you.

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