1. Some people will make feel bad or guilty for creating boundaries or saying no without explanation. You don‘t owe them anything, and the same goes vice versa.
2. Learn to create ‘breaking points’ in your circuit of life – where you treat the next day as a complete restart in the patterns you've been repeating.
3. Loving things for arbitrary reasons is perfectly acceptable, because mostly everything (if you think hard enough) is arbitrary. Optimize for joy, always.
4. Being a better listener makes people more interested in you.
5. Pivoting is not wrong. Sometimes your solution doesn't belong to anyone's problem.
6. You don't expect yourself to always stay the same, so why do you unconsciously expect that of other people?
7. People can love you very very much and still misunderstand you.
8. Pay attention to the things you believe even without proof. Those things make you vulnerable.
9. Love is an act of maintenance. It's easy to fall in love things, people, places in the beginning when experiences are novel. But to maintain that love is a choice. This gorgeous line by Merwin: "Would I love it this way if it could last?"
10. Dunbar's Number: we can really only have 150 relationships – of, on average,
5 intimate friends, 15 good friends, 50 friends, and 150 acquaintances (all-encompassing). Emotional intensity shrinks at each rung, and for me the first rung is where I put 90% of time and intention toward.